Positive thinking: Stop negative self-talk to reduce stress

 

Positive thinking helps with stress management and can even improve your health. Practice overcoming negative self-talk with examples provided. By Mayo Clinic Staff Is your glass half-empty or half-full? How you answer this age-old question about positive thinking may reflect your outlook on life, your attitude toward yourself, and whether you're optimistic or pessimistic — and it may even affect your health. Indeed, some studies show that personality traits like optimism and pessimism can affect many areas of your health and well-being. The positive thinking that typically comes with optimism is a key part of effective stress management. And effective stress management is associated with many health benefits. If you tend to be pessimistic, don't despair — you can learn positive thinking skills. Understanding positive thinking and self-talk Positive thinking doesn't mean that you keep your head in the sand and ignore life's less pleasant situations. Positive thinking just means that you approach unpleasantness in a more positive and productive way. You think the best is going to happen, not the worst. Positive thinking often starts with self-talk. Self-talk is the endless stream of unspoken thoughts that run through your head. These automatic thoughts can be positive or negative. Some of your self-talk comes from logic and reason. Other self-talk may arise from misconceptions that you create because of lack of information. If the thoughts that run through your head are mostly negative, your outlook on life is more likely pessimistic. If your thoughts are mostly positive, you're likely an optimist — someone who practices positive thinking. The health benefits of positive thinking Researchers continue to explore the effects of positive thinking and optimism on health. Health benefits that positive thinking may provide include: Increased life span Lower rates of depression Lower levels of distress Greater resistance to the common cold Better psychological and physical well-being Reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress It's unclear why people who engage in positive thinking experience these health benefits. One theory is that having a positive outlook enables you to cope better with stressful situations, which reduces the harmful health effects of stress on your body. It's also thought that positive and optimistic people tend to live healthier lifestyles — they get more physical activity, follow a healthier diet, and don't smoke or drink alcohol in excess. Next References See more In-depth http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950

15 Things Insanely-Productive People Do Differently

 

Productivity by Benjamin Hardy Productivity is not doing lots of stuff fast. You can do lots of stuff and get nowhere closer to your ideal. Most people are living their lives this way. They are burning themselves out running in a million different directions. Our society has become obsessed with constant doing. There’s little time left for being and living. Productivity is purposefully and consistently moving in a desired direction. Insanely productive people have learned the two most important things every person needs to know in this life: Who they are What their purpose (path) in life is And that’s where we begin:   1. They Know Who They Are And Who They Want To Be Productivity is a sexy topic lately because most people are radically confused about who they are. As a result, they want a quick scheme to the world’s definition of success. They’ve yet to define success for themselves. They want it all laid out for them. They want a to-do list. They believe that doing lots of stuff will get them what they want. Maybe it will impress other people? Maybe it will get them ahead of the competition? But who really is the competition? That’s the problem. Most people are still competing with other people. They are trying to fit in. They’re trying to be perceived as awesome. In truth, they’re profoundly insecure. They’re caught in an endless identity crisis – going from one thing to the next. Whatever is popular at the time – the illusive quest for acceptance—the lack of depth and commitment. And that’s the difference. Non-productive people seek security externally. They seek security in a paycheck, or in friends, or in perceived success. Rather than experiencing security, in reality, they are the slaves to these things. They will do anything to have these things. They are not free. However, insanely productive people know that security can only really be experienced internally. They know who they are. So they don’t worry about all these traps that sabotage and slow the masses. They fully accept and understand themselves – and that’s good enough for them. No external standard of success will ever compare to their own self-awareness and acceptance. Beyond knowing who they are, they know who they are going to become. They’re not going to be tossed off course by the next big thing. Until you know who are you, you will never be insanely productive. It doesn’t matter how much you “accomplish” in your life if it’s not the life you really wanted to live – the life you were meant to live. Insanely productive people have moved well beyond that. Their evolution has opened within them the space to do what only they can do. Every person on this planet is a unique individual with a unique opportunity to serve and give in their own personal way. You can’t do that work until you know who you are.   2. They Know Where They Want To Go “Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?” “That depends a good deal on where you want to get to.” “I don’t much care where –” “Then it doesn’t matter which way you go.” – Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland Like point one, most people want to be told where to go. They want to be told who to be. They don’t really care where it is – so long as it seems awesome to everyone else. This sidetracks people all the time. Rather than doing what they genuinely love, they take the job that offers the most money, prestige, or accolades. They spend decades of their lives on the wrong path. At some point or another, they have their identity crisis and realize they have no idea what they really want in life. They have no idea where they are going. However, insanely productive people are purposeful about where they intend to end up. Every day of their lives is spent building toward their highest ideal. The things on their to-do lists actually make cohesive sense. The truth is, insanely productive people aren’t moving any faster than the rest. More often, they are moving slower. The difference is, unlike the norm, insanely productive people are moving in one direction. Five steps in one directions seems like a lot to the person who has moved one step in five directions.   3. They Let Go Of The Need For A Specific Result Jeremy Piven, the famous actor, was recently interviewed by Success Magazine. During the interview, he mentioned that, as an actor, the only way to work is to go out and audition for specific roles. The challenge most actors/actresses face is that they get in their own way. It doesn’t matter how much homework they’ve done. If they’re too tied to a specific result, they can’t be present in the moment. They can’t truly perform their art. They come off as desperate. They get in their own way. Their performance isn’t what it could have been. Jeremy said that when he quit worrying about a specific result, he was able to be present during his auditions. He was able to be completely who he wanted to be. He wasn’t trying to be what he thought others wanted him to be. He performed his art. If he didn’t get the gig, either they didn’t get it or it just wasn’t the right fit. So he moves on to the next. In this way, he’s able to get the jobs he’s supposed to have. He’s not just trying to get anything he can get. Insanely productive people are the same way. They are raw and real. They are present and perform on their highest level because they aren’t dependent on a particular outcome. They have an innate trust that everything will work out for them if they’re authentic. They trust in the universe – their higher power – to take them where they need to go.   4. They Don’t Care What Other People Are Doing Most people spend the majority of their time watching and observing other people. The goal is to emulate and copy, or to compare and compete. This highlights an utter lack of achieved identity – an emotional and spiritual immaturity. On the other hand, insanely productive people spend very little if any of their time worrying about what other people, “their competition,” are doing. They see this as a distraction from their work. They put their heads down and execute. Gary Vaynerchuck, perhaps one of the most productive people on earth, says he doesn’t have time to read other people’s stuff. He’s too busy creating his own content.   5. They Don’t Care What Other People Think “What people think of you is none of your business.” – Amy Hatvany The majority of the population lives in absolute fear about what other people think of them. They try to be perfect. They try to be liked. They are unwilling to be vulnerable. To be real and truthful. Insanely productive people put themselves completely out there. They are doing their work for themselves and for the people it was intended for. Anyone outside their target audience doesn’t exist to them. Haters and critics are flowers, not darts.   6. But They Care Intensely About Those They Serve Despite caring very little about what other people think, insanely productive people care fiercely about other people. They have a love for humanity that is nothing short of divine. Every person has infinite potential in their worldview. When they look at another person, they see a person – not an object. They feel. Like really feel. It’s not a staged act. Insanely productive people are incredibly empathetic. They relate with people on their level. They’re relevant and connect. They influence with their love. Those they serve can feel it and they’re changed.   7. Their Work Is Their Art – It’s Highly Personal Insanely productive people don’t have jobs. They are artists – even if accountants, bankers, or lawyers. The work they do is everything they are. They give completely to their work. It’s emotional labor. When they finish, there’s nothing left. If it isn’t meaningful, they don’t do it. To do so doesn’t make sense to them. If they can’t feel it deep when they are working, they are not working. They’re not living. They’re not in the zone. And they seek that zone. That’s when art and magic happens. Everything in their life is set up to create that space. This is why they were born.   8. They Don’t Need Permission Most people wait. They believe they can start after they have enough time, money, connections, and credentials. They wait until they feel “secure.” Not insanely productive people. Insanely productive people started last year. They started five years ago before they even knew what they were doing. They started before they had any money. They started before they had all the answers. They started when no one else believed in them. The only permission they needed was the voice inside them prompting them to move forward. And they moved.   9. They Learn Through Doing Theory can only take a person so far. Putting yourself out there and falling flat on your face, over, and over, and over is how insanely productive people learn. Rather than having meetings and discussions, they go out and practice. While most people are reading, thinking, and dreaming, insanely productive people are out doing. The goal is to learn while creating output. Non-productive people on the other hand have a lopsided ratio of input and output – with very little of the latter.   10. They Don’t Take Themselves Too Seriously Insanely productive people have an ease about life. Everything is going to be okay. They allow themselves to laugh and to feel and to love. They don’t overthink themselves. They don’t define themselves by their achievements. They laugh at themselves when they make blunders. They’re okay with the fact that they’re not perfect. They embrace their humanity. They genuinely like themselves as a human being. They don’t crucify themselves at every mistake. They give themselves the benefit of the doubt.   11. They Can Enjoy Where They Presently Are On The Path “When someone says: “So what’s next?” As in, “how are you going to top that?” You don’t have to have an answer. The answer can be: “This.” Your life doesn’t have to be about impressing other people or a successive series of achievements.”- Ryan Holiday Insanely productive people find joy in the journey. They aren’t always waiting for that next chapter in life. They are happy with where they are. They are alive. Non-productive people wait for contentment until after they graduate from college, or get that promotion, or retire. All the while, their life passed them by and they never really experienced the moment.   12. They Ask For Help “Rainmakers generate revenue by making asks. They ask for donations. They ask for contracts. They ask for deals. They ask for opportunities. They ask to meet with leaders or speak to them over the phone. They ask for publicity. They come up with ideas and ask for a few minutes of your time to pitch it. They ask for help. Don’t let rainmaking deter you from your dream. It’s one of the barriers to entry, and you can overcome it. Once you taste the sweet victory of a positive response, you’ll not only become comfortable with it, you might even enjoy it. But making asks is the only way to bring your dream to life.” – Ben Arment Insanely productive people know they don’t have all the answers. They aren’t afraid to ask for directions when lost. They aren’t too proud to say when they’re having a hard time. Amanda Palmer is a famous musician. Her career is based on making asks. She left her record label so she could give her music away for free. She had enough trust in her fans and followers to ask them for help in exchange for the value she provided them. She launched a Kickstarter and made well over a million dollars. She couchsurfs all over the world. Her fans bring her food. All she does is ask. She asks because she has courage. She asks because she has trust. She asks because she wants to be vulnerable with her tribe. They give generously because they have been the generous recipients of her gifts.   13. They Drop What’s Not Working “Extraordinary benefits also accrue to the tiny majority with the guts to quit early and refocus their efforts on something new.” – Seth Godin Insanely productive people understand the concept of sunk cost. When something isn’t working, they drop it and move on. They don’t continue putting resources into a burning ship.   14. They Think Laterally Rather Than Vertically “Lateral thinking doesn’t replace hard work; it eliminates unnecessary cycles.” – Shane Snow Most of the United States Presidents spent less time in politics than the average congressman. Moreover, the best, and most popular Presidents, generally spent the least amount of time in politics. Rather than spending decades climbing the tedious ladder with glass ceilings, they simply jumped laterally from a different, non-political ladder. Ronald Reagan was an actor. Dwight Eisenhower laterally shifted from the military. Woodrow Wilson bounced over from academia. These men spent considerably little time in politics and became fabulous Presidents. They reached the top by skipping the unnecessary “dues-paying” steps. Insanely productive people think the same way. Rather than climbing up ladders the traditional ways, they think of alternative routes. They skip unnecessary steps by pivoting and shifting   15. They Constantly Prune Their Lives “You cannot overestimate the unimportance of practically everything.” – Greg McKeown Last but certainly not least—insanely productive people continuously “clean their closet.” They live minimally. When life starts getting too busy, they step back and remove what is unneeded. Rather than adding more to their life, they say, “no” to almost everything. If they’ve made non-essential commitments in their future, they cancel those superfluous appointments. Their lives are simple and to the point.   http://www.lifehack.org/287129/15-things-insanely-productive-people-differently?mid=20150807&ref=mail&uid=580391&feq=daily

9 Things You Need To Stop Doing If You Want To Be Successful

 

Communication Motivationby Emina Dedic Earl Nightingale,  motivational speaker and author, once said, “We become what we think about.” Perhaps truer words have never been spoken. The human mind is an incredible thing, and having the right attitude and mindset has routinely been stated by numerous successful people as being a pivotal key to success. Sometimes, however, it is easy to get side-tracked. Situations in life can get in the way of our goals, self-esteem, and personal well-being. Truthfully, success is a subjective term, and everyone will disagree over what constitutes being successful. Here are a list of guidelines, however, of some things to stop doing if you want to be or feel successful.   1. Stop Expecting Perfection Often, we get frustrated when things don’t work out the way we want them to, or as quickly as we’d like them to. We stress over small details, or beat ourselves up for getting one thing wrong, or forgetting to dot one I or cross one T. People are fallible. Mistakes and drawbacks are a fact of life. Nothing is nor will it ever be perfect, and that’s okay. Stressing out over minute details or things that would have been impossible to get to is unproductive and unhealthy. Start saying that you will do your personal best, because at the end of the day, you’re not in competition with anyone but yourself. Example: Jennifer Lawrence is someone who everyone seems to be talking about right now, but did you know she was rejected for the role of Bella Swan in ‘Twilight‘? She also didn’t take theater classes. She just trusted her instincts and worked as hard as possible to land acting roles. Obviously, she wasn’t perfect for every role, but she didn’t expect perfection. She takes her failures and rejections well, trying to learn from each situation.   2. Stop Saying Yes When You Want to Say No It’s always important to know your limits, and people will always try to test them. Human beings are social animals. We want to interact with others and feel like we are a part of something or like we are special to someone else. People also, for the most part, like to please others. Sometimes, however, it’s easy to be taken advantage of. Whether it’s helping a co-worker with something when you can’t really afford to, or loaning a friend money you can’t really afford to give. Out of guilt, people often say yes to people and situations that they really should say no to. Don’t be afraid to trust your gut and say no. Sometimes you can’t stay a few hours later because you had other plans or important errands to run. Sometimes it’s okay to say no to that co-worker that keeps nagging you for help but is really just stalling because they don’t want to work and know you’ll help them. Sometimes it’s okay to prioritize other things over work. Saying no is healthy. Saying no means that you know your boundaries and can demand respect. Example: Margaret Thatcher is known as being tough. She was a powerful politician. She also knew during her career when she had to take a stand, and sometimes that stand meant saying no to bad political and economic policy.   3. Stop Negative Self-Dialogue We all can probably play back in our minds every negative or embarrassing thing we’ve ever done to ourselves, been subjected to, or done to someone else. Whether it’s tripping over one’s shoelaces in the fourth grade, or being fired from a job, wronging someone else, or overhearing someone speaking negatively about us, those thoughts are forever solidified in our minds. Replaying those thoughts, however, and constantly punishing oneself for past mistakes, is counterproductive at certain points. At some point, it’s more important to learn from situations and move on, instead of psychologically beating yourself up. The next time you find yourself saying, “I’m not pretty enough”, “I did this horrible thing once five years ago and I’ll never forgive myself”, or any type of statement along those lines, turn off that negative self-dialogue. Look in the mirror and say something kind to yourself. Read some inspirational quotes. Acknowledge that you are taking steps and making an effort to be a better person. Admit to yourself that everyone makes mistakes, and most importantly, that making mistakes is okay. Example: This article does a good job of listing Steve Job’s failures. We remember him anyway, and we remember him as a pioneer and someone who didn’t give up. When things go wrong, and they often do, it’s easy for us to remember every mistake we have ever made along the way. Sometimes it’s easy to lose sight of our goals because of that lack of confidence. Don’t give up and attempt to stay positive. Train your brain to think of things in a new, more positive way. Most of all, keep working hard. Failure doesn’t have to be permanent.   4. Stop Focusing On Just Today Successful people tend to understand the value of a good plan. They plan out their day, their goals, a budget and they plan how much to save for retirement. That doesn’t mean they don’t have fun, though. They most certainly do! They just make sure to plan when it is appropriate and inappropriate to have fun. They make time for productivity and fun, but still save and think about the future. So, stop just focusing on today and having fun. Think about where you want to be in five, 10 or 15 years down the road! Having a good focus aids in success! Example: Neil deGrasse Tyson has been in love with the universe and science since he was nine years old. Because of that love, he worked long-term to study the things he cared about. He was accepted into Harvard where he majored in physics, eventually moving on to advanced education. His list of accomplishments would take up another full article in and of itself.   5. Stop Ignoring Your Goals Stop believing things will just work out for you because you’re a good person. Good things only happen to people who make an effort. A part of making an effort is setting goals for oneself. As evidenced in the previous point, it’s not enough to just focus on the day at hand. It’s important to manage time and set short-term and long-term goals in order to be able to track progress and have something to strive for. Example: Alan Turing is considered the father of artificial intelligence and computers. He also broke the code to the Nazi encryption machine called Enigma. He faced many challenges along the way, such as the inability to identify with others and being charged with indecency, for which he was eventually pardoned. Despite his personal struggles, though, he managed to break the code for Enigma, saving approximately 14 million people from death and in turn helped end World War 2.   6. Stop Isolating People Successful people understand that not everything is about work, church or similar obligations. Some things are about family, relaxation, and hobbies. It’s easy to get the impression that everyone who feels or defines themselves as successful probably has no spare time on their hands, and in some cases, that’s true. However, it isn’t always. Social isolation can kill people. In fact, many successful people have mastered the art of balance. They don’t isolate the people they love because they have large goals or something they want to accomplish. Instead, they incorporate those they love into their goals and hobbies. Example: According to a recent Forbes article, many leaders feel lonely. However, here are 25 examples of social business leaders who seem to thrive on relationships. It’s okay to know how to work alone and prefer that, but it’s also important to be able to rely on your staff, friends, and family for support. Involving people in leadership or product processes makes them feel valued and provides valuable feedback. Successful people enjoy that relationship. They also enjoy their time away from their goals and work to spend time with their loved ones.   7. Stop Comparing Yourself To Everyone Else Successful people understand that the only person they can compete with today is the person they were yesterday. They are too focused on themselves and their goals to worry about anyone else. They don’t want to compare themselves to others because it’s counterproductive. However, they do analyze where they have weak points and are able to genuinely admire people who have mastered things they have not. There is no use to comparing yourself to someone else. It’s counterproductive and harmful to your self-esteem. It also helps to harbor negative self-dialogue. Example: Taylor Swift is one of the most successful recording artists of our time, but before that, she was a struggling musician in Nashville playing at small venues and coffee shops. She would turn in demos to various studios, covering a variety of songs. It was only when she started playing and writing her own music that she got noticed and became the celebrity she is today. She faced a lot of adversity as well. There were people who doubted her skills and told her she couldn’t sing. Her confidence and faith in herself overcame that. 8. Stop Living In The Past Successful people learn from their failures, but they do not live in the past. They take the skills and lessons they acquired from their failures and apply them to the present and future. Don’t live in your own personal past. Don’t define yourself by who you were. Define yourself by who you are today and by who you’re working toward becoming. Example: Would we even remember Thomas Edison if he gave up on his ideas before becoming successful? Can you imagine simply focusing on what happened yesterday? So what if yesterday was a failure? Try again! Failure teaches us about what doesn’t work, and helps us get closer to a process that does work. Choose your attitude and control it. Move forward. Remember, failure is feedback.   9. Stop Tolerating Dishonest People Successful people appreciate other people for their unique traits and gifts. They do not attempt to harm, belittle, or in any way demean others for their own successes or ideas. They are open to relationships with others, but know when to cut the cord, so to speak. People can be too forgiving when it comes to being wronged, and it’s important to know one’s limits. Successful people do not tolerate negative and dishonest people, because they are too busy loving honest, sincere people. Example: Everyone. We have all had frenemies. We have all invested in people who did not return our investment in them. Successful people know how to weed these dishonest people out. No one wants unneeded negativity around themselves or around the people they love. Read this article for tips on how to deal with dishonest people.   source : http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/9-things-you-need-stop-doing-you-want-successful.html

How to Maintain a Healthy Work-Life Balance in the Age of Technology

 

Work by Henry Fan We are living in a digital age and are always connected to our computers, tablets and smartphones. Just a few decades ago, when the workday ended at 5:00PM, workers packed up and turned their minds off for the evening. However, because of our constant connection through technology, client emails, proposals and projects have become a part of time spent outside of the office. These extra hours and inability to step away from work have caused many individuals to call for a work-life balance, which places an emphasis on juggling work and maintaining a personal life with family and friends outside of the office. Here are some suggestions for succeeding with work and your personal life both inside and outside of the office:   Incorporate Physical Activity Into Your Routine Incorporating physical activity into your routine is an important part of maintaining a work-life balance. Physical activity not only helps to refresh both your mind and body, but also provides mental clarity during a time of stress at work. In addition to this, it keeps your body in optimal physical shape, which makes you feel more productive and healthy. Summer is the perfect time to place an emphasis on physical activity. If your schedule does not allow for going to the gym before or after work consider making this a part of your workday. Step away from your desk and take a walk with a co-worker to gain a new perspective and exercise your muscles.   Separating from Electronic Devices Another important aspect of maintaining a work-life balance is separating from electronic devices during evenings and weekends. If you feel the need to complete extra work or respond to emails outside of the office designate a specific time for these responses. For example, allow yourself to complete work in the evenings from 6-8 and then close your laptop. Or, respond to emails Saturday morning and then take Sunday off. Find what works best for you and your schedule and make a point to separate from electronic devices and clear your mind. While spending time working outside of the typical 9-5 has become normal in our current workforce, working all day every day is not efficient and will eventually cause you to burn out.   Make Work Productive The Internet and social media have made our lives faster and easier. Workplace communication that previously took place in the form of long meetings and phone calls has been replaced by quick email and instant message exchanges. While the use of technology for communication has saved us time, it can often serve as a distraction as well. This is important to keep in mind at the office. When you are at work make it productive and spend your hours completing projects and assignments instead of surfing the web or checking Facebook. Consider keeping a time-sheet to monitor your hours and stay on task.   Incorporate Downtime Into Your Routine Take some time to do what you love whether that means spending time with friends and family or investing in a hobby. Having an active social life often correlates with having a positive work life so make sure to invest in what makes you happy outside of the office. This will provide you a sense of meaning and allow you to define yourself outside of a work role. Feeling overwhelmed by a situation or project at work? Sometimes the best ideas come when your mind is refreshed and focused. Grabbing dinner with a friend and discussing your situation may provide new light and a solution to your problem. Take some time to see how others in your office maintain a work-life balance and follow their lead. They may have tips to help you achieve the work-life balance you have been looking for. source : http://www.lifehack.org/275432/how-maintain-healthy-work-life-balance-the-age-technology?mid=20150730&ref=mail&uid=580391&feq=daily

10 Reasons to Focus on Steps, Not Goals

 

Productivity Success by Matt Duczeminski When you want to improve an aspect of your life, it’s important to set goals. This is how you know where you want to end up. However, once you’ve set a goal for yourself, you should focus on the small steps you’ll be taking in order to reach this goal. You should always keep your final destination in sight, but know that it’s the small steps that will guide you there. Here’s what you can expect by keeping the small steps in mind.   1. You won’t feel intimidated Maybe your goal is to become a master guitarist, but you don’t even know how to play a chord. It can be incredibly intimidating to watch a Grateful Dead concert as Jerry Garcia moves up and down the fret board for hours without breaking a sweat. You’ll most likely get the feeling that you’ll “never be able to do that,” and run the risk of quitting before you even get started. By taking small steps toward your goal, you’ll feel less intimidated when you see others who are above your level.   2. You’ll see progress constantly If you’re constantly looking at your endgame as your only goal, you won’t think you’re getting anywhere when you make a small improvement in your skills. When you focus on the small steps, you’ll see progress almost instantaneously. Yesterday, you might have set out to memorize the order of the guitar strings. It can be highly motivating to see this goal accomplished. It might not seem like a huge accomplishment, but you’ll know you’re one step closer to achieving your overall goal.   3. You’ll appreciate the process When you focus on the small steps, you’ll realize that even the experts have been in your shoes at one point in their lives. It’s hard to imagine a time in which Garcia didn’t know the difference between an E and an A string, but he had to have started somewhere, right? The small steps might be boring at times — do you think Michael Jordan really loved taking foul shots all day? — , but going through them is an absolute necessity if you want to reach your goal.   4. You’ll learn the basics It might be tempting to skip steps at times in order to reach your goal faster. However, this will only lead to confusion and frustration in the long run. Imagine a child trying to learn multiplication before he or she learns how to add. So much instruction would be lost in this method that the child wouldn’t possibly be able to succeed. The old saying is true: “You have to learn to crawl before you can walk.” Take baby steps to ensure you can handle the small stuff before moving on to the big time.   5. You’ll learn more While you’re learning the basics, you should slow down and try different methods to accomplish your short-term goals. There’s always more than one way to get something done. Going about a task in a variety of ways will lead you to the most efficient way for you to complete the task at hand. You might learn something about the whole process that you would have missed had you rushed through the small steps.   6. You’ll understand the fundamentals It’s not enough just to complete the small tasks — you have to understand why you completed them. Tuning a guitar might seem pretty straight-forward, as you can just memorize each string’s open note and tune it. However, it’s important to take the time to understand the relationship between the strings, and how each is utilized when forming chords and scales. Go beyond rote memorization and truly comprehend each step as you progress toward your goal.   7. You’ll anticipate success If you schedule the small goals to be accomplished, you’ll know on Wednesday what you’ll be able to do on Friday. This not only gives you an idea about how you’re moving forward, but it also motivates you to keep up the hard work. If you schedule out your week of practice and growth, skipping a day will set everything back. When you’ve put it all in writing, you’ll be even more motivated not to let yourself down.   8. You’ll adapt your goals Then again, some days you might not do as well as you’d hoped you would. That’s certainly alright. By setting mini-goals along the way, you’ll be able to modify them depending on your progress the previous day. While you would most likely feel disappointed in yourself for skipping a day of work, there’s no shame in getting stuck on a previous step as long as you’re making strides to overcome it.   9. You’ll celebrate small victories When you set smaller goals, you’ll be able to celebrate more. Like I said, making a schedule and anticipating success will allow you set your sights on a short-term goal, possibly a week-long one. Once you reach that smaller goal, you’ll definitely feel much more accomplished than you would if you’d reached that point without considering it a “goal.” Every small accomplishment is reason to celebrate, so don’t downplay your improvements.   10. You’ll keep pushing yourself If you set one major goal for yourself at the beginning of your journey, you run the risk of becoming complacent once you reach that goal. For example, if your goal was to run a six-minute mile, and it took you months to get to that point, you might just breathe a sigh of relief and consider yourself a success. While that would undoubtedly be a great accomplishment, there’s still room for improvement. If you had spent months improving your time and acknowledging each incremental improvement, you’re more apt to celebrate your milestone and then get back up the next day and work to shatter your own record. Love this article? Share it with your friends on Facebook Matt Duczeminski Matt is a part-time freelance writer trying to make the move to full time, so be prepared to be inundated with articles you may or may not find interesting. Hopefully you do. No, you definitely will. Catch up with me on LinkedIn or Twitter! source : www.lifehack.org

Signs your’re doing better than you think you are

 

You know what you don’t want. We spend so much of our lives searching for what we truly want. The life partner that will make our lives more meaningful. The career that will make us more fulfilled. We look at those around us and wonder why we haven’t yet achieved all that they have. But we don’t have to base our lives on other people’s schedules. It’s okay to take your time to figure out what you don’t want. It’s okay to narrow down your choices. It’s okay to discover what you want through finding out what you don’t. You want to be happy, not just content  and you deserve that. You take responsibility for your life. We’ve all experienced some form of pain in our lives. Maybe we’ve suffered heartbreak, death of a loved one, financial hardship, or problems with our families and friends. We can’t erase those horrible experiences, but we can choose to move forward from them. If you’ve realized that your future is in your hands, then you’re taking responsibility for your life and what happens to you. You understand that you can’t change the past but you can change what happens from now on. You know the value of genuine relationships. At one point or another, you’ve probably surrounded yourself with negative, toxic people. People who bring out the worst in you. But now you’ve let those people go. You understand that it’s not about the quantity of people that you know – but the quality of the relationships. You know that you deserve to spend your time with people who deserve your time. You refuse to be around people who bring you down and who are unable to share your happiness and you know that you deserve so much better. You know there’s more to life than material possessions. It’s so easy to get caught up in trying to find happiness through objects, but such happiness doesn’t last. You don’t need to buy the latest products to be happy. Likewise, you don’t need the most expensive clothes or house. If you know that happiness doesn’t lie in material possessions, then you’re placing more importance in the relationships in your life. You know that a homemade birthday card from a friend can be much more meaningful than an expensive gift from the shop. You don’t let the little things bother you. We all get upset from time to time, and for different reasons. Regardless of what the problems are, no matter how big or small, our feelings are always valid. However, we need to remind ourselves that life really is short. If you don’t let the little things bother you, then you’re giving yourself more time to experience all the good that life has to offer. You’re bouncing back sooner and finding the maturity to move on. You’re making the conscious decision to choose happiness over anger. You don’t let pride get in the way of asking questions. We all need help sometimes. Naturally, we all want to grow and to expand our knowledge. If you find yourself struggling to ask questions, don’t let embarrassment and shame talk you out of it. There’s no such thing as a stupid question. If you already find yourself asking questions when you’re unsure, be proud that you do. You understand and value achieving growth through learning. You know that life is about balance. It’s easy to struggle with the work-life balance, but you know where your priorities lie. You may not always get it right, but you try your best and that’s what matters. You do what you can to spend time with your family and friends. You do what you can for yourself and for your career, and you do what you can to look after yourself physically, emotionally and mentally. You’re grateful for what you do have. There’s a lot in your life that could improve, but you choose to be a ‘glass half full’ person. You know that there are people in your life that you can depend on and who care about you. You know that your house may not be the most extravagant, but you’re grateful that you have a roof over your head. Some people aren’t blessed with the basic necessities that you have and you can appreciate that fact. You’re grateful that you have the freedom to do what you want with your life and although you may not ‘have it all’, you’re grateful for all that you do have. You’ve picked yourself up after challenges. We’ve all climbed mountains we thought we’d never surpass. We’ve been confronted with challenges that have tested us on so many levels. Yet, here we are, still standing. If you’ve fallen down and picked yourself up, recognize the amount of strength that it took. Acknowledge that you’ve overcome so many adversities you once thought you couldn’t and how you’re so much stronger than you knew. You add meaning to the people in your life. Sometimes, when we’re feeling down about life and all the goals we haven’t achieved, we might forget the impact that we’re having on people’s lives. You might not have the career that you want or achieved the goals that you’ve planned yet, but you’re making people smile. You’re making them laugh. You’re making their lives brighter just by being in it. Even if you don’t realize it, you’re likely adding much value to the lives of others just by being there. Paying your friend a compliment may not seem like much to you, but it could be making all the difference to them. It could be the thing that gives them hope when they need it the most. You’re striving to become a better person. Life is a learning curve. We don’t need to be perfect. We don’t need to live free from mistakes. If you are determined to improve yourself and to become better, then you are already halfway there. You may not be happy with your career, your relationships, with who you are, but you still have the chance and the opportunity to have a brighter future. If you are doing all you can to become better, then maybe you’re doing better than you think you are. Thuy Yau Thuy Yau is a freelance writer and she wants to make a positive difference through her writing. She is very passionate about parenting, personal development and psychology. Her work has appeared on major Australian news sites and been discussed on the radio. She lives in Perth, Australia with her husband and three children. She is also studying to become a Youth Worker.

26 Things To Remember If You Want To Be Truly Happy

 

Communication by Marzena Bielecka If you’ve asked yourself how to become a happier person, this is already a very good sign. Happiness is not something that happens to us by chance. Being happy is an achievable and learnable skill, which requires constant work on your attitude and depends on how you interpret your life situation. Happiness is largely a matter of choice. And it is probably the smartest life choice you can make. Recent studies show that happy people are 35% less likely to die early than unhappy ones! So, what do you need to remember if you want to be truly happy?   1. Never dwell on the past “Learn to appreciate what you have before time makes you appreciate what you had.” – Unknown Your past is just a story. Everyone has a past – often full of pain, disappointment, missed opportunities, and unfulfilled expectations. No matter what your past looks like, it’s just a story – so don’t let it influence you. Make the present meaningful.     2. Never focus on what’s missing; look at what you actually have. “Happiness is not having what you want. It is appreciating what you have.”- Unknown Be grateful for what you have. You could waste hours counting the things you would like to improve, which would only take you away from appreciating your real life. Gratitude puts situations into perspective and rewires your mind toward a positive direction.   3. Never underestimate quality time with yourself. “Focus on loving yourself instead of loving the idea of other people loving you.” - Unknown Don’t confuse happiness with excitement; a lasting joy of life grows when your mind is in peace. Making time for yourself is as important as devoting time to your everyday duties. Regular meditation, sport, contact with nature, and quality (offline) time spent reading will help you reconnect with yourself and hear your intuition again.   4. Never stop improving yourself. “Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever”. – Mahatma Gandhi We are all different, and there is no perfect direction or path to our personal evolution. The whole point is to become the best version of YOU, and never stop taking lessons from your own life experiences.   5. Never be too harsh on yourself. “Be gentle with yourself. You’re doing the best you can.“ - Unknown Many of us are our own hardest critics, constantly diminishing every success. Accept that you will never be ideal – and see this as okay. In the process of self-development, embracing your own vulnerabilities has been scientifically proven to be a key component of happiness.   6. Never lose a sense of purpose in what you are doing. “What you do today is important, because you are exchanging a day of your life for it.” – Unknown Your time and life power are limited, so spend them wisely and target your energy towards something meaningful. Finding a purpose helps you live a bigger life.   7. Never treat your body badly. “Your body is precious. It is your vehicle for awakening. Treat it with care.” – Buddha A truly happy soul can only live in a healthy body. Your body will “send you a bill” for the trash you’ve eaten, the sports classes you’ve skipped, your long nights of partying, and your long hours of stressful work. Treat your body as your biggest investment; it will have to serve you your entire life.   8. Never value material things more than experiences. “Your actions are your only true belongings.” – Allan Lokos Experiences bring people more happiness than possessions, which never keep you satisfied. Experiences will last in your head forever, nourish your mind, and become a memory which will light up your face with a smile on a bad day.   9. Never compare yourself to other people. “True happiness is when you are living your life without waiting for anyone’s approval.”- Unknown Everyone lives life at a different pace, which makes us each special and beautiful. The sooner you embrace your uniqueness and the differences between you and other people, the happier you will be. Surround yourself with people who appreciate you for who you really are without trying to change you or reframe you.   10. Never let your bad thoughts grow. “The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts” – Marcus Aurelius Being judgmental, jealous, or angry will at some point turn against you. A bad thought can trigger bad speech, just as bad words provoke bad actions. Don’t let your mind initiate anything you’d be ashamed of later.   11. Never fear to embrace change. “You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one.”- Unknown As you accept the laws which change our life, our bodies, and the way we evolve, you will see the unique beauty of every moment in life with all its natural flow. Be open to new opportunities and humbly accept changes you can’t influence.   12. Never blame others for your own failures. “Don’t look for someone who will solve all your problems. Look for someone who won’t let you face them alone.” – Unknown Be responsible for your actions and their outcomes. Taking responsibility gives you a sense of power over your life; blaming your life on circumstances can make you feel powerless.   13. Never tame your curiosity. “If you do nothing unexpected, nothing unexpected happens.” – Fay Weldom Be curious and ask a lot of questions. Travel, observe, read, watch, and talk with smart people to open your mind and explore the world. Inquisitive thinking and a passion for exploring will nourish your mind.   14. Never stop being mindful. “Don’t wait for the perfect moment. Take the moment and make it perfect” – Unknown Learn to mindfully observe, smell, hear, and fully appreciate every minute of your life. Those who can’t conscientiously notice and appreciate the present moment aren’t able to be fully happy.   15. Never forget about your loved ones. “The only way to have a friend is to be one.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson Care about those who are happy to see you succeed in life and support you in difficult times. Avoid harsh critiques and make sure these people know how glad you are that they’re a part of your life.   16. Never worry about the things you cannot influence. “Worry is a total waste of time. It doesn’t change anything. All is does it steal your joy and keep you very busy doing nothing.”- Unknown How many times has a situation you’ve worried about not come true? Worrying about things you can’t influence is a waste of time and makes you feel unnecessarily miserable.   17. Never attach happiness to something in the future. “Think of all the beauty that is still left in and around you and be happy.” – Anne Frank Many people live like they’re waiting for something – to find a perfect love partner, to get promoted, or to retire with a good pension. Don’t postpone your happiness to a moment in the future; life is all about enjoying the journey.   18. Never stop meeting new people. “People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.” – Joseph F Newton Surrounding yourself with happy people makes you happier. Meeting new people nowadays is easy, due to open lifestyles, new technologies, internet forums, popular mobile apps. It would be a waste to not make the most of this opportunity. Even people who enter your life for a short time can teach you important lessons and make your life more colorful.   19. Never let your ego win. “Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. It’s a relationship between equals.”- Pema Chodron Acting with anger and following your insecurities can only complicate your life situation. Instead, act with compassion and humility towards others. Showing maturity will make your relations with others more joyful and fulfilling.   20. Never voluntary harm. “A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.” – Mark Twain Every choice you make, every word you say, and every purchase you make impacts someone’s life. Choose to be a good person.   21. Never stop living life to the fullest. “Hug harder. Laugh louder. Smile bigger. Love longer.” – Unknown Live intensely. Do what you want and enjoy it with all your senses. Start working on fulfilling your dreams as soon as possible. “Hug harder. Laugh louder. Smile bigger. Love longer.”   22. Never forget to smile. “Use your smile to change the world; don’t let the world change your smile.” - Unknown You don’t know what the person in front of you is going through. Be kind to others and share your smiles and positive words. Isn’t it amazing to make someone’s day a little better in such a simple way?   23. Never be afraid to completely change your life. “If you’re still looking for that one person who will change your life, take a look in the mirror.” – Roman Price It is never too late to completely change your life and make it more meaningful. Let your mind be free and surprise you from time to time.  Go with the flow and open yourself up to different possibilities.   24. Never be afraid of being alone. “If you make friends with yourself you will never be alone.” – Maxwell Maltz Don’t be afraid of being alone. Happiness is internal, and you don’t need anyone or anything to be happy. Learn to have fun on your own: walk, travel, eat good food, etc. Being alone doesn’t mean to you have to be lonely. Look at monks for example – being happy in solitude is a virtue.   25. Never stop organizing your own happiness. “Confidence is preparation. Everything else is beyond your control.” – Richard Kline Happiness appears where dreams meet preparation. Make a conscious everyday effort to shape yourself and your life the way you want.   26. Never stop loving. “Love as much as you can from wherever you are.” – Thaddeus Golas True love doesn’t lose value over time; it multiplies and comes back to you the more you give it away. The meaning of our whole existence would be much simpler if love meant only romantic love. Love everyone who you think deserves and needs your love. Love the Earth and the people who have helped you become who you are. Love your own life. Marzena Bielecka Marzena Bielecka is a Berlin-based writer and travel addict. She has visited over 50 countries and traveled thousands of kilometers just to see how people live there. During her free time, she likes to lie on the grass and look up at the sky. She also writes for Wingman Magazine. Write For Us!

5 Ways to Improve Your Attention

 

Things You Can Do to Minimize Distraction and Increase Concentration It happens to the best of us. You're sitting in class or in a meeting and you suddenly find yourself daydreaming, losing focus, and not paying attention. In one study of over 2,000 adults, people reported that their minds weren't really on the task at hand almost 50 percent of the time. Perhaps even more importantly, people report feeling less happy when they are distracted. So what can you do to improve your attention, increase your focus, and prevent your mind from wandering? Researchers have discovered a few different things that might help: suedhang/Image Source/Getty Images 1. Stop Multitasking Trying to do many different things at once makes it more difficult to concentrate on any one thing. While it might seem like multitasking can help you accomplish more, research has shown that juggling multiple tasks actually reduces both productivity and accuracy. If you want to make the most out of your attentional resources, try focusing on just one task at a time. Thomas Barwick / Getty Images 2. Practice Mindfulness Mindfulness involves purposely paying attention to things in a particular way, and new research suggests that practicing mindfulness might actually help improve your ability to concentrate. According to research presented at an annual conference held by the British Psychological Society (BPS), children who took a short training course in mindfulness were better able to concentrate and ignore distractions. Juzant / Getty Images 3. Meditate Researchers have found that those experienced in meditation are better at focusing their attention on a single item and ignoring irrelevant items. What about people new to meditation? Can practicing this skill help you better focus your attentional spotlight? The research indicates that the answer is yes. Participants in one study who learned to meditate and practiced for approximately 30 minutes per day were quicker to notice new stimuli, indicating that they had improved their attention. So why exactly does meditation help? One suggestion is that it decreases the attentional blink that we all experience. Attentional blink is a brief period of time after we focus on one item, about half a second, where we are unreceptive to secondary stimuli. Essentially, focusing on one thing makes us briefly blind to other things. One study found that participants who received meditation training demonstrated a marked reduction in attentional blink. Tetra Images / Getty Images 4. Turn Off the Technology From smart phones to video games to online video, it seems like we spend a huge chunk of our day absorbed by various forms of technology. Unfortunately, research has demonstrated that the constant distraction presented by such technology can actually make it more difficult for young children to focus on activities such as reading for an extended period of time. If you want to focus your attention and fully devote yourself to a task, turn off the technology - at least for long enough to let you finish the job. Zakaria Wakrim / Getty Images 5. Practice Makes Perfect Meditation can help you learn to improve your focus, but it takes practice to learn how to bring your bring your attention back to the task at hand. Researcher Wendy Hasenkamp suggests that becoming aware of when your mind has wandered, actively disengaging from the distraction, and bringing your focus back to the task at hand can help make people more mindful of how they utilize their attention. The more you notice that your mind has wandered, and thus the more you actively bring yourself back to a state of attention, the better you will become at maintaining your focus on a single task. "Understanding the way the brain alternates between focused and distracted states has implications for a wide variety of everyday tasks," Hasenkamp explains. "For example, when your mind wandered off in that meeting, it might help to know you’re slipping into default mode—and you can deliberately bring yourself back to the moment. That’s an ability that can improve with training." Final Thoughts If you've ever felt like you have a "short attention span" or if you often catch your mind wandering when you should be focusing on a task, you might be able to benefit from some of these "attention boosting" activities. Eliminating distractions, putting an end to multitasking, meditating, and actively practicing these skills are just a few of the things that researchers believe can have a beneficial influence on attention. Think of attention as a muscle – the more you work with it, the stronger it will be.

15 Funny Things Everyone Can Do Every Day to Get Smarter

 

Productivity by Amy Johnson Do you want to become smarter? Many people want to exercise their brain regularly, but struggle to find the time or money to take classes or invest in their intelligence. Check out 15 little things that you can do every day to become smarter.   1. Start a productive hobby. Doing something every other day will help you to learn more without even noticing. Knitting, running, and learning to read sheet music are all examples of fun, cheap hobbies that will help you to become smarter without realizing it.   2. Check the news online or read the newspaper. Checking in with current affairs will help you to become more aware of world events and the society you live in. It will also help you to form educated and well-formed opinions that you can later discuss with others.   3. Start two to-do lists. Start a to-do list with long-term goals and second with short-term goals. This will help you to figure out your priorities, and you can set yourself realistic career-based and personal goals. Your short-term to-do list should cover the next month or so, and your long-term to do list could take anywhere between one year or 25 years.   4. And an “I did” list. Write a list of all of the accomplishments you have achieved this year, and add to it as you accomplish new things. Include both small and big achievements, to help motivate you to push further. This can also show you how productive your week has been, and how you can be smarter and more proactive next week.   5. Read a chapter in a book. Try to read a chapter in a book every day. Many people believe they don’t have time, but there are plenty of options; when you’re commuting to work, during your lunch or in the evening instead of surfing the Internet. It doesn’t matter what you read; fiction can help you to see from another perspective and become more analytical, and a non-fiction book will teach you something new, whether it is about history or a biography.   6. Come up with five different ideas everyday. Be creative and use your brain every day! From solving your daily problems to thinking of funny movie and book ideas, coming up with ideas will exercise your brain and help you get used to relying on yourself, rather than Google.   7. Find answers to your questions. Do penguins have knees? No matter how silly the question, try to find the answers to all the little, random question that fly through your head. You will become more knowledgeable in many different areas without feeling like you were learning!   8. Share your ideas with others. Debating with others gives you the chance to analyze your ideas while adding to each other’s knowledge. Debating also helps you learn to express your ideas coherently and intelligently. If you feel a little nervous, try joining a knowledgeable forum and join in a debate that is already happening.   9. Try different mindsets. Take something you already have an opinion on and try to see things from the other side. Coming up with evidence to support it will help you to become more open-minded and inquisitive, helping you to think outside of the box on a daily basis.   10. Start a list of things to stop doing. Try to monitor your procrastination every day for a week, and write down your results. What activities do you do when you procrastinate, or it there anything that you do that leaves you feeling uninspired? This will help you to break bad habits and figure out what you need to stop doing, making every day more productive for you.   11. Subscribe to interesting feeds. If you like to spend time on social media, make your feeds more interesting and knowledgeable to become smarter. There are groups on Facebook and Twitter that cover science and political news, so consider searching through a few and finding a couple that really interest you personally.   12. Talk to someone interesting. You are surrounded by interesting people, from your family to your boss to strangers on the street. People often learn more from strangers than their own loved ones.   13. Explore. If you can’t afford to explore the world, explore your city. Try things you wouldn’t normally consider, from opera to going to a live music night. New experiences come with new facts and knowledge for you to discover, so take an adventure and see what you learn!   14. Watch educational videos. YouTube is filled with interesting vlogs and TED talks, so try to watch one a day while you’re relaxing. The videos range from 5 minutes long to 30, so even when you’re busy you can normally fit a 5 minute video into your day. One of the best parts of these videos is that the information is presented in easy, digestible chunks, so even if you are half-listening you will probably end up learning a few things and becoming smarter!   15. Do something scary. People who fear leaving their comfort zone can limit themselves with fear. From public speaking to eating a food you don’t like, try to push yourself out of your comfort zone once a day. These steps will help you to realize you can accomplish anything you want, as well as helping to make you more curious and open minded—as well as fearless!

13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do

 

Communication Motivation by Amy Morin Mentally strong people have healthy habits. They manage their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in ways that set them up for success in life. Check out these things that mentally strong people don’t do so that you too can become more mentally strong.   1. They Don’t Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves Mentally strong people don’t sit around feeling sorry about their circumstances or how others have treated them. Instead, they take responsibility for their role in life and understand that life isn’t always easy or fair.   2. They Don’t Give Away Their Power They don’t allow others to control them, and they don’t give someone else power over them. They don’t say things like, “My boss makes me feel bad,” because they understand that they are in control over their own emotions and they have a choice in how they respond.   3. They Don’t Shy Away from Change Mentally strong people don’t try to avoid change. Instead, they welcome positive change and are willing to be flexible. They understand that change is inevitable and believe in their abilities to adapt.   4. They Don’t Waste Energy on Things They Can’t Control You won’t hear a mentally strong person complaining over lost luggage or traffic jams. Instead, they focus on what they can control in their lives. They recognize that sometimes, the only thing they can control is their attitude.   5. They Don’t Worry About Pleasing Everyone Mentally strong people recognize that they don’t need to please everyone all the time. They’re not afraid to say no or speak up when necessary. They strive to be kind and fair, but can handle other people being upset if they didn’t make them happy.   6. They Don’t Fear Taking Calculated Risks They don’t take reckless or foolish risks, but don’t mind taking calculated risks. Mentally strong people spend time weighing the risks and benefits before making a big decision, and they’re fully informed of the potential downsides before they take action. You may be interested in this too: 14 Things Positive People Don’t Do   7. They Don’t Dwell on the Past Mentally strong people don’t waste time dwelling on the past and wishing things could be different. They acknowledge their past and can say what they’ve learned from it. However, they don’t constantly relive bad experiences or fantasize about the glory days. Instead, they live for the present and plan for the future.   8. They Don’t Make the Same Mistakes Over and Over Mentally strong people accept responsibility for their behavior and learn from their past mistakes. As a result, they don’t keep repeating those mistakes over and over. Instead, they move on and make better decisions in the future.   9. They Don’t Resent Other People’s Success Mentally strong people can appreciate and celebrate other people’s success in life. They don’t grow jealous or feel cheated when others surpass them. Instead, they recognize that success comes with hard work, and they are willing to work hard for their own chance at success.   10. They Don’t Give Up After the First Failure Mentally strong people don’t view failure as a reason to give up. Instead, they use failure as an opportunity to grow and improve. They are willing to keep trying until they get it right.   11. They Don’t Fear Alone Time Mentally strong people can tolerate being alone and they don’t fear silence. They aren’t afraid to be alone with their thoughts and they can use downtime to be productive. They enjoy their own company and aren’t dependent on others for companionship and entertainment all the time but instead can be happy alone.   12. They Don’t Feel the World Owes Them Anything Mentally strong people don’t feel entitled to things in life. They weren’t born with a mentality that others would take care of them or that the world must give them something. Instead, they look for opportunities based on their own merits.   13. They Don’t Expect Immediate Results Whether they are working on improving their health or getting a new business off the ground, mentally strong people don’t expect immediate results. Instead, they apply their skills and time to the best of their ability and understand that real change takes time. The tougher people may live a happier life because they can do these simple things: 10 Things You Never Realized You Could Do To Be Happy Featured photo credit: Pretty young woman with sketched strong and muscled arms via Shutterstock

14 Things Phenomenally Successful People Do Differently

 

“In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure”-Bill Cosby What quality do you think differentiates the winners from the losers? Why are some people so successful in reaching their goals while others can’t achieve them? Because of their mindset, beliefs, and habits. Your brain is the first keystone to success. The second is your everyday actions, your daily habits. This list consists of 14 habits and beliefs that characterize phenomenally successful people—14 things that can transform your life as soon as you put them in your arsenal. If you want to become successful, you should get some paper and start taking notes.   1. They Know That Time Is Their Most Valuable Asset They don’t let others make them invest time in activities they consider boring and counter-productive to their self-development. You shouldn’t do that either. When you think that something is a waste of your time, don’t do it. Your time is an asset that IS NOT INFINITE. Nobody on this planet has unlimited time, yet people tend to spend their time like garbage. The first thing you MUST DO if you want to change your life, become more successful, and achieve your goals is to change your perception of time. Realize that your time is not infinite and that you should spend it wisely, because it doesn’t come back.   2. They Step Out Of Their Comfort Zone The only path to personal growth is doing things that make you feel awkward. When all you do is walk inside your comfort zone, you can’t grow as a person. You stay static because your activities can’t change you. If what you do doesn’t challenge you, if it’s not uncomfortable and difficult, then you should raise your standards and increase the game difficulty. You can’t build muscle if all you do is lift feathers. You have to lift heavy rocks.   3. They Create & Pursue Specific Goals Most people don’t have goals at all. They don’t know what they want to do in their lives. They are just walking around like zombies. Would you ever take your car and start driving endlessly without knowing where you are going? Well, of course not. So why are you doing the same with your life? This is not a game, you don’t have 8 lives, only one. Setting up goals and having a destination is essential if you crave success. But that’s only the first step. The second step is to take these goals and make them specific. A goal like “I want to lose weight” isn’t specific. A goal like “I want to lose 15 pounds in the next 3 months” is what you should have in your mind.   4. They Focus on Small Continuous Improvements Most people try to achieve overnight success. They want results instantly! Those who succeed in life know that things take time. How much time will it need? It takes as long as it takes. There is no certain period of work that guarantees success. Instead of trying to get rich in one month, you should focus on making little daily improvements. These improvements add up as the time passes, and after months or years of daily commitment, the progress is HUGE. That’s what every successful person does. Unfortunately, people can’t see the daily effort, as they only see the final outcome. Don’t ignore the progress. It might take some time, but it will be worth it. Focus on getting better every single day instead of trying to achieve a huge leap forward in just a week or so.   5. They Dress to Impress When you dress like a winner, people tend to respect you more. In psychology, this is known as The Halo Effect. In particular, people tend to make a perception of your whole character based on a single quality that you have shown them. If you look great and you take care of your appearance, then people assume that you are someone who deserves their respect—someone who is also successful, reliable, and kind. When Aristotle Onassis went to America, before becoming a millionaire, he spent all his money to buy clothes that would highlight his style and class. If Onassis gave such importance to his physical appearance, I don’t see any reason that you shouldn’t do the same.   6. They Maintain a Positive Mindset Your thoughts are the brush that paints your destiny. Successful people think positive and don’t look at their disadvantages. They fight with what they have and always seek improvement. But this improvement can’t come if your mind is continuously occupied by negative thoughts and stress. Positive thinking has been found to reduce stress and, according to Mayo Clinic, it also offers benefits like: Increased life span Lower rates of depression Better psychological and physical well-being Reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress   7. They Embrace Failures Phenomenally successful people carry the belief that failures are the stepping stones to success. Each failure yields rewards bigger than a win because it can offer you an invaluable life lesson. Start seeing your failures as an opportunity to become better instead of letting them bring you down and disappoint you.   8. They Surround Themselves With Winners Jim Rohn has said that “you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.” People with who you associate play a significant role in your life because they form your lifestyle and beliefs. If you are around people who are full of negativity, you won’t be able to maintain positive thoughts. On the other hand, if you are around people who write down their goals, focus on daily improvement, and dress to impress, you will be pushed to become the best version of yourself. Surround yourself only with like-minded people who have big dreams and are eager to take the necessary steps to achieve them. They will take you to the top with them.   9. They Don’t Seek The Perfect Moment, They Make a Random Moment Perfect What are you waiting for? The right moment will never come. The circumstances will never be ideal, and if you wait for tomorrow to get started, it will never come. Tomorrow is just an excuse for inertia. There is no perfect moment. What matters is to get started as soon as possible and make the best out of what you have.   10. They Don’t Brag, They Listen Successful people are ALWAYS eager to learn new things. They ask questions and they listen carefully to other people’s advice. They usually don’t talk too much because they are focused on listening and processing information. On the other hand, losers always speak about how much they know and how amazing their accomplishments are. They are so blinded by their need for acceptance that the only thing they care about is to brag about what they know. And in most cases, they just talk the talk. They don’t walk the walk.   11. They Know That Education is a Constant Process. Do you believe that you should stop learning when you finish school or college? If the answer is yes, then it’s crucial to change that belief before it’s too late. Education shouldn’t stop at school or college; you should learn new things every single day. It isn’t a coincidence that the most successful people are those who have read countless books and have spent a lifetime acquiring new skills.   12. They Help Other People Success isn’t about caring for your selfish needs. It’s about caring for the needs of others. EVERY successful person accomplished his goals because what he did really helped others in some way. Mark Zuckerberg gave the world a tool that made it easy to connect with their friends. Larry Page and Sergey Brin gave world a system (Google) that made it easy to find unlimited information in milliseconds. Famous singers and actors help people by fulfilling their emotional needs. If you want to succeed in life, you shouldn’t focus on yourself, you should focus on how you can improve other people’s lives!   13. They Have The Courage to Say NO This is actually a quality that really separates the winners from the losers.When you are not afraid to say no, you have already avoided the need to please everyone. Trying to please everybody is impossible and can only lead to disappointment. When you don’t want to do something, just say no without apologizing for your decision.   14. Successful People Take Ownership Of Their Actions Most people make the mistake of pointing fingers to others for their faults. They never accept responsibility for their actions and always believe that someone else is responsible for their misery. Targeting others for your frustrations won’t help you achieve your goals, it can only hurt other people’s feelings or even create enemies. In fact, your actions or your inertia is what actually determines the quality of your life. Blaming others is just an excuse to avoid the hard work needed to change your life. Stop blaming others and take care of your future, because it depends only upon YOUR ACTIONS.